The Day Tea went Splat on the Windshield of a Car
by Obscured Illusions
Summary: Tea goes to the movies with Yuugi and Co.! What will happen there? Warnings: A Tea bashing fic. Rating may go up due to later chapters.


Author's Note: This is a short side fic that I'm writing on… the side (hence the side-ficciness O.o …) hoping to get rid of the slump that threatens to devour my whole writing career on fan fiction.net! o.o' woww….  
  
Disclaimer: Yu-Gi-Oh! Belongs to me! ::glares at lawyers:: It's all mine! I stole it from Kazuki Takahashi! .; bwahahahaha!! ::lawyers rise, bringing their briefcases with lethal legal materials inside:: O.O;;; OKOK! ::waves hands in front of face:: It's not mine! I lied I lied I confess!!!  
  
Warnings: Tea bashing, OOCness, Missing Scenes, a bit of shonen-ai (I couldn't write a fic without shonen-ai! ::looks shocked at the idea:: of course not!) and a bit of Mai bashing. Oh and sexual references.  
  
Pairings: Yami Bakura/Yami Marik/Malik, Yugi/Tea, Ryou/Tristan?, Yami/NO ONE! HAHHA! And Seto/Joey and Mai/Everyone! XD) and Shuuchi/Yuki (Gravitation)   
  
For the purposes of this fic, Bakura Ryou will be called Ryou, and his yami will be called Bakura. Marik Ishtar will be called Malik, and his yami will be called Marik.   
  
((TEXT))- me butting in.  
  
OK! On with the fic.  
  
_The Day Tea Went Splat on the Windshield of a Car  
  
_  
Tea's POV  
  
I opened my eyes, looking up to see sun streaming through the square sun-roof I had cut in my cardboard box. It was a wonderful day to be alive, especially under the Domino City Bridge. The living was crowded; I had to share my area with about 6 other neighbors, but I wasn't complaining. As long as I had friendship to keep me motivated, I could withstand anything. Anything, as long as it wasn't 2 tons of screeching metal, hurtling toward me at 80 miles per hour.  
  
I uncovered myself from under the rat-skin I was using as a blanket, and dressed myself with the same clothes I wore every day. I worked as a prostitute, roaming down streets and waiting at street corners, hoping to earn a bit of money. Lately though, I hadn't been earning as much money as I usually did, owing to the fact that every guy in my territory had now switched over to laying the new girl on the block, Mai Valentine. She wore a tight purple bodice, and a short purple skirt, letting her luxurious blonde hair spill over her back. I was jealous of her; she took my well-earned money away from me. Granted, most of my money came from men paying me to "get my ugly mug away from the street corner and to go screw some other poor, unsuspecting guy instead", but either way I was well paid. I purchased a cell phone with that money, so I could keep in touch with all of my friends, and an extra pair of clothing for weekends, when I wasn't working or at school, so I could spend time with my friends.  
  
Once I was 'clothed', I decided to call Yuugi and ask him to go to a movie. Hopefully his Yami would fission off of him, so that I could drool over his luscious body. I had asked him if I could perform my special services on him many times, but he had always refused. I supposed he was a gentleman; he didn't want to take advantage of me or my job. I was grateful for the consideration, but I still just wanted to get some from him. I could even imagine it in my dreams… I sighed. The nights I had those kind of dreams were very… busy.   
  
"Tea?" came the voice from the other side of the line. "Yuugi!" I chirped. "Want to go see a movie?" "Sure" Yugi said, brightly. "I'll call the others. Bye Tea! See you at the Domino Movie Centre at 11." Frowning, I put my cell phone away. Although I had wanted to spend time alone with Yami, I knew it would be unfair to my friends to exclude them. I sighed. Sometimes I felt that my friends were a burden- no. I wouldn't think that way. Friends kept the world spinning around on it's normal course, and I wouldn't change that for a few selfish hours of time with my love. I double checked the contents of my home, and my attire, and walked outside. Hopefully no one would burglarize my paper box while I was gone.  
  
"Hey, Tea!" A neighbor greeted me, waving. "Hey, Jack!" I replied. Jack had been my neighbor ever since I had moved under the bridge 3 years ago. Before I had lived in the Domino City Subway, but the police had made me move somewhere else. I would get my revenge someday… but that would be another story. For now, I would continue living life under the bridge. "Uh… Tea? Are you listening to me?" a voice came through, interrupting my thoughts. "OH! I'm so sorry. Continue, Jack!" I said, flustered. "I'm redecorating my box!" he burst out, excitedly. "Hey, awesome!" I replied enthusiastically. "If you need any help, just ask me! That's what friends are for!" I said, striking a victory pose. "Thank you Tea. You're such a good friend." Jack said, smiling. "Jack, I'm going to the movies. Good luck!" and with that, I was on my way to the Movie Centre. Hopefully the whole gang would be there, eagerly awaiting me. I imagined Yami standing by the popcorn, holding my ticket for me. The image was so powerful, I almost swooned. Holding that image forcefully in my mind, I almost didn't realize I had arrived at the Centre.   
  
Looking around, I saw the most adorable thing. Two guys making out right by a theatre door! Taking out the camera I had borrowed from Tristan, I began snapping shots of them. After a while, the blonde one lifted his head, and said in a calm, cool, collected voice, "Yes? Did you want something? Because as you can see, I'm busy right now." I squealed and asked, "What are your names? You look so… so… KAWAII together!!!" Raising an eyebrow, the blonde one began to reply. "Well, normally I wouldn't tell people who I am, as you should already _know_ who I am, but in this case I'll make an exception. I'm Eiri Yuki, at least that's what my pen name is, and I'm a-" He was cut off short as the burgundy haired boy pulled his face down for a kiss. "Eiiiriii!! YOU FORGOT ABOUT ME!!!" he wailed, tears pouring out of his eyes. "Shuuichi! I did not forget about you. I was talking to that girl over there! You are lover number one, remember? She is not more important than you are." Shuuichi's lower lip trembled, as he hiccupped and began to return to normal.   
  
Eiri rolled his eyes. "Forgive him, he's very insecure. But as I was saying-" "I AM NOT INSECURE! I AM SHUUCHI SHINDOU, THE TECHNO MASTER! PART OF THE GREATEST BAND ON EARTH, BAD LUCK! AND YOU'RE CALLING ME INSECURE!!??!" the younger boy huffed. "Wahhh what kind of boyfriend ARE you!?!?" he continued. "Shuuchi. I'm talking to-" he paused, and looked at me. "What did you say your name was?" Bunnies, flowers, and glitter in the pink, purple, and baby blue background surrounding me, I replied. "I'm Tea!" "-Tea. Now, be quiet while we finish our conversation."   
  
Sufficiently cowed, Shuuchi sullenly sat in the corner, a melancholy blue haze enveloping him. "How long have you two been going out?" I asked Eiri. "We're not actually going out- he just thinks we are. He's actually just lover #1, since I have so many." He replied, self confidently, brushing a lock of blonde hair out of his eyes. I sweat dropped, and laughed nervously. "In case you didn't hear me before, I'm Eiri Yuki, novelist extraordinaire. My books are the top sold books across the nation, and I've earned so many awards on them that even my _editors_ have lost track." I heard a snicker to my left, and Shuuchi spoke out. "He writes ROMANCE novels. Some big macho occupation _THAT_ is…" He evidently had emerged from his blue funk. Eiri stood, glaring at his lover, lightning bolts flaring out from behind him. "I'll deal with you when we get home." he spoke, in a level, intimidating monotone. Shuuchi sweat dropped. "Heh heh… I'm just kidding Eiri…" His voice quavered.   
  
A voice cut across the lobby. "TEA! ARE YOU HERE YET??" I jumped up, and pounced on Eiri and Shuuchi. "Awww! You both are so adorable! But I havta go now. Byby!" I started toward Yuugi and Co., but remembered something. "Oh! I almost forgot. Here's my card! Give me a call on my cell phone. I think we're going to be good friends!" I told them, and spontaneously hugged them. "Yuugi!!!! I'm coming!" I said, running up to my friends. Behind me I could hear Yuki talking to Shuuchi. "Well, I guess I shouldn't have gotten mad at you. I mean, you're only a kid, and an amateur keyboarder/vocalist at that. I should have expected drabble like that coming from you." Shuuchi fell to the ground, twitching. "AMATEUR?!? I'M BETTER THAN THAT!" he leaped up, growling. Shaking my head, I followed Yuugi to the ticket-taker.   
  
"Yuugi? What movie are we seeing?" Checking the tickets, he replied, "Princess Mononoke, Akira, Samurai X, and Neon Genesis Evangelion. It was a special 4-movies-for-the-price-of-one special!" ((A/N: Those movies do not belong to me in any way, shape, or form. Sadly for me.)) Tristan groaned behind me. "Cartoons?" he asked. "We're not children anymore, are we?" Tristan looked around, looking for confirmation. Ryou sidled over to Yuugi, along with Malik. "I'm rather sorry Tristan, but on this count you're not supported by us. We like cartoons, and enjoy these kind of movies." Ryou said, in his quaint English accent. Malik was looking in awe at the carpeting on the theatre floor- apparently it was an intriguing weave they used in the making of it. Tristan sighed, and shook his head, muttering something under his breath. I heard but a snatch of it. "Little kid movies…" Well, at least I would get to enjoy the time I spent with Yuugi.   
  
"YAY! I GET TO SPEND ALL THIS TIME WITH MY FRIENDS!" I burst out, hoping to lighten the mood. I glomped Yuugi, who was the closest to me. "Tea… I… can't… breathe…" Yuugi told me, beginning to take on a purplish tinge. "YUUGI! I'M SO SORRY! FORGIVE ME!" I told him, on my knees in front of him. "IS THERE ANYTHING I CAN DO TO MAKE IT UP DO YOU!?!? I'LL DO ANYTHING! …And I mean anything." I said, giving him a roguish wink. I knew he might succumb to my wiles, seeing as I knew he had wanted to see me on my knees in front of him for a long, long time. I felt bad for using Yuugi like this, but anything that could get me closer to my love… Yuugi's face turned progressively red. "Hold on guys. I need to… talk to Tea for maybe 15 minutes." The whole group sweat dropped, and turned green. They knew what was about to happen, and were sickened by it. "Urgh… where's Joey when you need him?" Ryou asked, delicately. Lucky for me, Joey was preoccupied with Seto at the moment. We walked toward the bathroom. Maybe, if I asked nicely, Yuugi could get me a date with Yami?   
  
Missing Scene   
  
15 minutes later, we came out of the bathroom. Yuugi very flushed, with me slightly out of breath and very thirsty. I was amazed; I never knew someone that small could have such a huge… but I digress. We had only gone to 3rd base, but that was because Yami would have shunned him. I was a bit disappointed; Yami refused to go out with me. But I could wait.  
  
We journeyed into the movie theatre, Ryou, Malik, and Tristan holding a conversation in the back of Yuugi and I. Yuugi sat, and I immediately sat next to him, in hopes that he might let Yami watch also. Tristan sat next to me, Ryou next to him, then Malik. Joey, as Ryou had pointed out before, was at Seto's mansion, while Mai was working overtime, attempting to pay for her credit card bill. I was glad that my friends paid for me though; otherwise I would have died of starvation and the like by now. The lights dimmed, and I knew the movie was about to start. Suddenly, there was a flash coming from my right. Bakura had emerged from the confines of Ryou's Millenium Ring! Just as soon as Bakura and Ryou looked at each other, there was another flash and Marik came out of his soul room, landing on Malik's lap. I whipped out my camera, and snapped pictures of them from across Tristan's lap. They all looked so cute together!   
  
I abruptly stopped snapping pictures, and frowned. Marik's hair was just so disarrayed! He should have at least made it look more like Malik's hair… My fingers itched to remove my scissors from my purse and start fixing Marik's hair. But my chance was lost, as Malik, Marik, and Bakura all tumbled in a heap to the floor, doing God knows what. I swore slightly under my breath, and accepted my defeat.  
  
Looking beside me, I saw Tristan make a mushroom shaped sigh. I agreed with him; they shouldn't have done _that_ THERE… Beet red, Ryou was attempting to shrink into his seat, while pretending to be oblivious towards his yami's antics, happening less than a foot away from him. He noticed our stares, and dryly stated, "Maybe if I don't look, it will all go away." He edged over closer to Tristan. "I want to be as far away as I can from them…" Tristan's cheeks turned crimson, and I laughed inwardly. This would be a great matchmaking opportunity… "Hey Ryou! Why don't you sit on Tristan's lap? I'm sure he wouldn't mind." I said, all sweet and innocently. "I um er ah but see…" Tristan stammered, flustered.   
  
Chuckling wickedly, I cut him off. "Is it a problem Tristan? If it is, he could always sit in _my_ lap…" He took the bait. "NO! HE'S MINE!" Ryou looked at him questioningly. "I mean ah… it's not problem. No problem at all." Tristan glared at me sullenly. Hey, at least he was getting what he wanted- what _I_ wanted was still not in my grasp. But someday… someday… or maybe even sooner. I'd get Yami whether he liked it or not.   
  
To be continued…

A/N: DUN DUN DUN!!! Wouldn't you like to know what happens? WOULDN'T YOU?? HUH HUH!? Wow im on crack. XD Well, R&R. It didn't come out as well as I wanted to, owing to my evil, abhorrent, sickening, hateful, vile, detestable, revolting, ::goes on and on with adjectives:: …. SLUMP!! ;; well, anyways. Please read and review! Ja for now. 


End file.
